Scale: Sizzle with Tizzle (Great!), Sizzle (Good!), Lacks Sizzle (Meh, if ya like that sorta thing.), Fizzle (Don’t!).
Rating: Lacks Sizzle.
I know oooh! Jimmy Smits! James Earl Jones! Ewen McAlsoHasManTits! And they all have British accents, because a long time ago, in a Galaxy far away, the British Empire extended to the farthest reaches of Space, and taught everybody the Queen’s English, one can only surmise.
Jimmy Smits escaped from his cop uniform and absurd NY accent, but still with man tits, a gut and a bad British accent, opening the series as a Senator of the Empire, is a perfect metaphor for this series. Been there, done that, good ‘nuff, wow it’s him, check the box.
This show bought all the right workout clothes and went to the gym, but didn’t do the Work. No muscle was broke to form an invigorated, updated story; no sweat, no risks. No impact.
The Inquisitors were very cool and scary, until a completely unnecessary and emotionally annoying plot twist rendered them silly. We just needed them to be scary, not intertwined with the emotion of the story.
And such a thin story. Darth mad at Obi. Darth go after Obi. Darth much stronger than Obi, then, for absolutely no reason, Obi stronger than Darth. Flashback to Angry Annakin. Plot twist with Inquisitor makes show less interesting and even more implausible. Fat Liam Neeson, all shimmery and wise. Plot twist! Inquisitor hates Darth, but also goes after little Luke and … by that time, I just didn’t care. I knew how it was going to end, and so will you.
(Editor’s Note: Apparently, TV is just not enough to get these middle-aged bums to the gym. Great actors only look out-of-shape when the part calls for it. Otherwise, loose guts and saggy chests are just flab on the story. Find your inner Tom Cruise, dad-bod contingent, or come to the other side of the screen with the rest of us).
The action was somewhat pleasing but other than an acrobatic rooftop scene with 3rd Sister, unimaginative and un-suspenseful.
There is too much Darth, similar to the mistake the otherwise brilliant Netfix Daredevil series made with the Kingpin. These characters have to be almost mythical and evil divine, not human, emotional, and ultimately, beatable in the big crescendo fight scene.
Darth loses mythical stature in this series as an uncomplicated, angry, vengeful leader who gets his ass kicked.
Obi Wan, as a Star Wars installment, checks the boxes with a lite-Sabre and a satisfied, distinctly British-sounding grunt. But rather than break new ground, we walked back through old ground and old plots with mostly old faces telling a story we already know.
We need an edgy Darth series to show his rise.
Throw out convention. Go Dark.
And, Force be with us, keep the dad-bods on our side of the screen.